Today’s society often focuses on the initial stages of romantic relationships, glorifying the passionate rush of falling in love. However, many fail to realize that sustaining love requires effort and dedication. While falling in love is easy and exhilarating, growing in love is a lifelong journey that demands maturity, understanding, and commitment. This article delves into the significance of transitioning from a mere feeling of love to a practice of love, highlighting the rewards and challenges of nurturing and evolving a deep connection.
Understanding Love as a Practice, Not Just a Feeling: Love is often mistakenly perceived as a fleeting emotion, something we stumble into by chance. However, true love extends beyond transient feelings and requires ongoing cultivation. It is a conscious decision and commitment to be the best versions of ourselves, both individually and as partners. Recognizing this paradigm shift is crucial to embracing growth and rising in love.
Navigating Conflict and Changes: Every relationship is bound to encounter conflicts and experience changes over time. Understanding that conflicts are not signs of a failing relationship but rather growth opportunities is essential. The initial hormonal rush inevitably subsides, giving way to a more stable and grounded connection. Instead of chasing the fading euphoria, couples who grow in love learn to adapt and find new ways to nurture their bond.
Embracing the Beauty of Growth: Growing in love requires maturity, acknowledging that our partner cannot be responsible for our happiness. It entails accepting that disappointments and disagreements are natural aspects of any relationship. There may be times when both partners are not on the same page or moments of boredom need to be addressed. It is through these challenges that love is tested and fortified.
Nurturing the Relationship: A thriving relationship demands constant nourishment. Growing in love means investing time and effort in self-reflection and recognizing areas within ourselves that require work. It involves being comfortable with occasional discomfort and periods where the emotional connection may wane. Moreover, it requires a willingness to give and receive, understanding that equality is not always about a perfect balance but meeting each other’s needs differently.
The Journey of Growth: While growing in love may not always be easy, it is a beautiful process that offers tremendous rewards. It can be an intense and transformative experience that unearths old wounds, triggering emotional responses from the past. However, it is through these challenges that trust, security, safety, and a joy-filled connection can be established, fostering a deep bond that withstands the test of time.
Moving beyond the initial stage of falling in love, growing and rising in love requires a shift in mindset and a commitment to continuous personal and relational development. Love is not merely a fleeting feeling but an ongoing practice that demands dedication, understanding, and the willingness to navigate challenges together. By embracing the beauty of growth and nurturing our relationships, we can cultivate profound connections that enrich our lives and create lasting happiness.
When it comes to relationships in nature, the partnership between orchids and fungi is a stunning example of symbiosis. As you carefully select a beautiful orchid for your loved one, did you know that orchids have their own partners? In this article, we delve into the intricate world of symbiotic relationships, shedding light on the various types of symbiosis and exploring how orchids and fungi create a unique and mutually beneficial bond.
Flavours of Symbiosis: Symbiosis, derived from Greek roots meaning “living” and “together,” encompasses relationships between different species where one species relies on another for survival. Much like a box of chocolates, symbiosis comes in different flavours, ranging from harmonious to more complicated connections.
Mutualism: In mutualistic relationships, both species involved derive benefits. In the case of orchids and fungi, mutualism is the driving force behind their bond, as they exchange carbohydrates and moisture, ensuring the growth and sustenance of both partners.
Commensalism: Commensalism describes a relationship where one species benefits while the other remains unaffected. Although not directly applicable to orchids and fungi, it is important to understand the range of symbiotic connections in nature.
Parasitism: Parasitic relationships involve one species benefiting at the expense of another. However, this type of relationship is not prevalent between orchids and fungi, as their partnership is primarily mutually beneficial.
Amensalism: Amensalism occurs when one species is inhibited or obliterated while the other remains unaffected. This type of symbiotic relationship does not apply to the orchid-fungi connection.
Orchids and Fungi: Orchids form a complex symbiotic relationship with certain fungi known as mycorrhizae. This relationship is critical for the survival of juvenile orchids, as they rely on these fungal symbionts for carbohydrates. In return, the fungi receive moisture and access to organic matter, creating a sweet and mutually beneficial arrangement.
The Role of Fungi in Orchid Growth: Since orchids often grow in habitats with limited sunlight, they face challenges in producing chlorophyll, essential for their growth. Orchids have overcome this obstacle by depending on specific fungi. These fungi digest organic matter in the surroundings, converting it into simpler molecules such as sugar that the orchids can absorb. Consequently, orchids rely on fungi during their early growth stages.
The Intricacies of Togetherness: In the symbiotic process between orchids and fungi, the fungi invade the orchid seeds before germination, providing vital nutrients to the young orchid. As orchids mature, some species can produce their food through photosynthesis. However, research suggests that even photosynthetic orchids may continue to utilize fungi as a supplementary food source.
The Hidden Connection: The intricate connection between orchids and fungi occurs between the plant’s root tissue and the fungus’s mycelium. While unseen to the naked eye, this relationship plays a vital role in the growth and nourishment of orchids.
Beneficial for Both: The fungi gain moisture and nutrition by digesting plant material in the roots of orchids. In turn, the orchids provide a water-rich environment for the fungi, ensuring their survival. The humid and moist conditions created by orchids offer a haven for the fungi to thrive.
Unveiling the Mycorrhizal Cheaters: Certain plants sometimes bypass traditional photosynthetic processes and obtain nutrients from nearby fungi. Referred to as “mycorrhizal cheaters,” these plants defy conventional methods of nutrient acquisition, showcasing the remarkable diversity of symbiotic relationships in nature.
As you celebrate your loved ones with romantic gestures, remember the captivating partnership between orchids and fungi—a love so true in symbiosis. This extraordinary relationship reminds us that giving and receiving are fundamental to any successful connection. From the sweet mutualism between orchids and fungi, we can learn valuable lessons about the beauty and intricacies of nature’s symbiotic dances.
In the depths of love’s vast sea, I wish for you, my dear, to see, A smile that greets you at the door, A love that leaves you wanting more.
May you find someone who embraces, The beauty within your soul’s spaces, Who sees the scars that tell your story, And finds them adorned with grace and glory.
I hope for you a love that’s clear, No doubts or questions, just sincere, A love that boldly lets you know, How deeply their feelings for you grow.
May you discover a love so true, That never hesitates, always pursues, A love that gives its entirety, No fragments, just pure sincerity.
I hope for you a love that understands, Your worth, the treasures in your hands, A love that cherishes your soul, And nurtures it, making it whole.
May you find a partner, strong and true, Your biggest supporter in all you pursue, Not seeking attention, but giving it back, A love that’s balanced, never off track.
But above all, my hope, my dear, Is that you find this love, crystal clear, Within yourself, before it’s found, So you’re ready when love comes around.
Discover the depths of your own heart, Unveil the love, ready to impart, For in loving yourself, you’ll truly see, The love you deserve, so wild and free.
So my hope for you, my precious friend, Is to embrace self-love, let it ascend, For when you’re ready, love will come, A love that’s beautiful, pure, and strong.
One day before I go, I want you to know, That your presence in my life, Fills me with joy and delight.
Your wisdom streaks so profound, In your soft brown eyes, wisdom is found. Your dimpled cheeks, so sweet, They bring a smile whenever we meet.
And that infectious smile you wear, Brings light to all who are near. Your towering height, a gentle might, Yet you always make me feel just right.
Your warm hugs, they hold me tight, In your embrace, everything feels right. Your effervescent presence, a shining light, Guiding me through the darkest night.
Your sense of humour, a constant delight, With your sharp wit, you set things right. Your cleft chin, a mark so fine, A reminder of a love that’s mine.
Even your anxiety-bitten nails, Can’t hide the kindness that prevails. Your heart is so kind and pure, With genuine concern, that’s sure.
For anger, you have no room, Your support never ceases to bloom. Your affection, pure and true, Unwavering in all that you do.
You tower above, head and heart, And in your cuddle, I find my start. That amusing grunt you make, Leaves me laughing, wide awake.
Your polite refusal, a mark of grace, In your passionate kiss, I find solace. Your loving caress, a tender touch, Brings comfort that means so much.
And oh, your delicious food, Filling my soul, my gratitude renewed. Engrossing conversations we share, Leaving me laughing without a care.
Your swift hand movements, so precise, Accompany tender talks that entice. Your magnetic vibes, I’m drawn to you, With every word, my love for you grew.
Driving with running commentary, Holding my hand, a beautiful story. Your engaging tales, they make me smile, Leaving me laughing for a while.
You’ve been my protector, my rock, Through thick and thin, around the clock. Your blue sheet conversations so deep, Leaving me yearning, longing to keep.
I look up to you, figuratively and literally, As your chin rest, my heart fills merrily. In my darkest moments, you’ve rescued me, Guiding me with love, setting me free.
You’ve shown me how to love unconditionally, Providing a sense of security. My knight in shining armour, strong and true, You make me feel cherished, driving my blues.
For keeping me afloat, my buoy, I send wishes for your days with joy. In awe, admiration, and adulation, I remain your pocket-sized Dynamo.
Thank you for being my full-course meal, While I am your sweet dessert, so surreal. With love, always and forevermore, Your pocket-sized Dynamo, forever yours.
In the realm of modern dating and relationships, breadcrumbing has emerged as a common and frustrating practice. Breadcrumbing refers to the practice of intermittently giving attention, communication, or affection to someone while lacking genuine intentions for a committed relationship. Discover how breadcrumbing keeps individuals on the periphery, with sporadic messages, occasional dates, and displays of affection that lead nowhere. Whether experienced in online or offline relationships, breadcrumbing can leave you feeling confused and emotionally drained.
Signs and Symptoms of Breadcrumbing: Recognizing the signs of breadcrumbing is crucial to protect yourself from potential heartbreak. Understand the common indicators of this practice:
Inconsistent communication: Breadcrumbers engage in sporadic texting or messaging, making you wait for their responses or providing vague replies.
Mixed signals: They send flirtatious or affectionate messages, but their actions contradict their words. Their interest and commitment may fluctuate.
Lack of initiation: Breadcrumbers rarely take the lead in progressing the relationship or initiating plans, relying on you to maintain the connection.
Minimal effort: They invest minimal effort into the relationship, such as occasional compliments, infrequent dates, or superficial conversations.
Excuses and postponements: Breadcrumbers frequently cancel plans or make excuses to avoid committing to future arrangements, leaving you feeling frustrated and uncertain.
Safeguarding Against Breadcrumbing: Protecting yourself from breadcrumbing requires awareness and proactive steps. Implement the following strategies:
Recognize the signs: Educate yourself about the signs of breadcrumbing to identify if you are experiencing it. Awareness is key to protecting yourself.
Trust your intuition: Listen to your instincts. If something feels inconsistent or off, address your concerns with the other person and trust your inner voice.
Communicate your expectations: Be clear about your desires and intentions. Openly communicate your needs and boundaries to filter out potential breadcrumbers.
Set boundaries: Establish and assertively communicate your boundaries. Breadcrumbers thrive on relationship ambiguity, so defining your limits can deter such behaviour.
Focus on reciprocity: Assess if the other person reciprocates your efforts and interest. A healthy relationship requires equal investment from both parties.
Prioritize self-care: Invest time and energy in activities that bring you joy and fulfilment. Engage in hobbies, spend time with loved ones, and prioritize personal growth to build resilience and self-worth.
Don’t settle for breadcrumbs: Recognize your value and worth. Refuse to accept half-hearted attention or inconsistent behaviour. Be willing to walk away from relationships that do not meet your needs.
Take time for reflection: Step back and reflect on the relationship if you suspect breadcrumbing. Assess if it aligns with your long-term goals and values.
Seek support: Reach out to friends, family, or a therapist to share your experiences and gain perspective. Having a support system provides guidance and emotional support during challenging times.
Understanding breadcrumbing and implementing strategies to safeguard yourself can protect your emotional well-being and cultivate healthier and more fulfilling relationships. Remember, you deserve genuine love and commitment, not mere breadcrumbs. Safeguard your heart and navigate breadcrumbing with confidence.
“The biggest coward of a man is to awaken the love of a woman without the intention of loving her.”
Bob Marley
Love bombing, a manipulative tactic used in relationships, can leave individuals emotionally shattered. This deceptive practice involves an intense showering of affection, attention, appreciation, and grand gestures that quickly captivate the victim. However, beneath the surface, love bombing conceals a darker intention—to gain control and power over the unsuspecting target. In this feature, we explore the phenomenon of love bombing and its devastating effects and provide insights into healing from its aftermath.
Love Bombing is a Psychological Deception: Love bombing is a term coined to describe a manipulative tactic employed by individuals with narcissistic or abusive tendencies. Research suggests that love bombers strategically employ excessive displays of affection, constant communication, lavish gifts, and flattery to overwhelm and captivate their targets. This overwhelming flood of positive attention and validation creates a false sense of security, deep emotional connection, and dependency within the victim.
The Devastating Effects of Love Bombing: While love bombing may initially feel like a whirlwind romance, the aftermath can be catastrophic. Victims of love bombing often find themselves emotionally shattered when the charade unravels. Research indicates that the abrupt withdrawal of affection and the unveiling of the abuser’s true intentions can lead to severe emotional trauma, including anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, and a distorted perception of love and relationships. The deceptive nature of love bombing makes it particularly damaging as victims struggle to reconcile the intense love they experienced with the painful reality they face.
Recognizing the Signs of Love Bombing: Awareness is crucial in identifying and escaping the clutches of love bombing. Some common signs of love bombing include:
Excessive flattery and constant praise.
Overwhelming attention and rapid progression in the relationship.
Isolation from friends and family creating dependency on the love bomber.
Frequent grand gestures and gifts to win affection and control.
Emotional manipulation and control tactics.
Healing and Recovery: Recovering from the aftermath of the love bombing requires time, self-reflection, and support. Here are some strategies to aid in healing:
Self-Care and Self-Compassion: Prioritize self-care activities that nurture your emotional well-being. Practice self-compassion by reminding yourself that you deserve love and respect.
Seek Support: Reach out to trusted friends, family members, or support groups who can provide understanding and guidance throughout the healing process. Sharing your experiences with others can help validate your emotions and regain a sense of empowerment.
Set Boundaries: Establish and enforce healthy boundaries to protect yourself from further manipulation. Learn to recognize and prioritize your needs and emotions.
Professional Help: Consider seeking therapy or counselling to process the trauma and regain emotional stability. A mental health professional can provide guidance and support tailored to your needs.
Moving Forward with Empowered Love
Recovering from love bombing involves rediscovering your self-worth and rebuilding trust in yourself and others. Remembering that healthy relationships are built on mutual respect, trust, and genuine care is essential. Be patient with yourself as you navigate the healing journey and focus on personal growth.
Love bombing may leave individuals shattered, but with awareness, support, and self-care, it is possible to reclaim personal power and rebuild a healthier future. Recognising the signs of love bombing and taking proactive steps towards healing, survivors can learn to differentiate between genuine love and manipulative tactics. Remember, you deserve love and respect that is authentic, nurturing, and built on trust. Embrace the healing journey, and let it catalyse growth, resilience, and empowered love.
Dixon, L. J., Hamilton-Giachritsis, C., Browne, K. D., & Ostapuik, E. (2005). The co-occurrence of child and intimate partner maltreatment in the family: Characteristics of the violent perpetrators. Journal of Family Violence, 20(6), 377-387.
The pain from a friendship breakup is real. It’s even worse if you don’t understand why it ended. People expect friendships to last forever. The ending is just as painful as romantic breakups. We just don’t talk about it.
Friendships are special in our lives, providing companionship, support, and shared experiences. However, when a friendship abruptly ends, the pain can be just as agonizing as a romantic breakup. Surprisingly, society often overlooks the emotional toll of friendship breakups, leaving individuals grappling with unanswered questions and a sense of loss. In this article, we delve into the unspoken heartache of friendship breakups, shedding light on their real impact and offering strategies for healing.
Understanding the Depth of Friendship Breakup Pain: Friendships are often perceived as enduring and eternal bonds, leading to high expectations of lifelong companionship. Consequently, when a friendship abruptly dissolves, the pain can be profound. Studies have shown that the emotional distress experienced after a friendship breakup is comparable to that of romantic relationships (1). However, unlike romantic breakups, the topic of friendship dissolution remains largely unspoken, further exacerbating the emotional turmoil.
The Lack of Closure: A Source of Intense Pain: One of the most challenging aspects of friendship breakups is the lack of understanding regarding why the relationship ended. Friends may not engage in open discussions or formal closure, unlike romantic partners. This lack of clarity often leaves individuals with unanswered questions, leading to self-doubt, rumination, and prolonged distress (2). The absence of closure can hinder the healing process, making it harder to move on and find resolution.
The Importance of Acknowledging and Validating Feelings: Acknowledging and validating the pain caused by a friendship breakup is essential. Recognizing that the pain is real and legitimate can help individuals navigate the healing process. Cultivating self-compassion and seeking support from trusted confidants can provide solace during this difficult time. Remember, your emotions are valid, and allowing yourself to grieve the loss is essential to healing.
Healing Strategies: Moving Forward
Self-Reflection and Acceptance: Reflect on the friendship and why it may have ended. Accept that friendships, like any relationship, can change and evolve over time. Acknowledge that personal growth and shifting priorities are natural, and it doesn’t diminish the value of the friendship shared.
Seek Support: Reach out to other friends or family members who can provide a listening ear and emotional support. Sharing your feelings with a trusted confidant can help alleviate the pain and provide perspective.
Engage in Self-Care: Engaging in activities that bring joy and comfort can aid healing. Whether practising mindfulness, pursuing hobbies, or taking care of your physical health, prioritizing self-care can facilitate emotional recovery.
Foster New Connections: While it may be challenging initially, opening yourself up to new friendships can help fill the void left by the breakup. Attend social events, join interest groups, or participate in community activities to meet new people with similar interests.
Friendship breakups are a deeply felt and often unaddressed aspect of human relationships. By acknowledging the pain caused by these separations and seeking to understand their impact, we can provide solace and support to those experiencing this silent heartache. Remember, friendship breakups are part of life’s journey, and with time, self-reflection, and nurturing new connections, the pain will gradually subside, paving the way for healing and growth.
References:
Sbarra, D. A., & Allen, J. J. (2009). Heartbreak and bereavement: Cognitive consequences and implications for self-concept. Annals of Behavioral Medicine, 37(2), 154-166.
Felmlee, D., & Sweet, E. (2005). To sever friendships: Context and meaning in relationship dissolution. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 22(1), 3-16.
The full moon in July 2023, known as the Buck Moon, will occur on July 3. It will be visible for three days. This full moon is also a supermoon, appearing larger and more vibrant due to its proximity to Earth during perigee.
Three of Us!
Have you ever wondered about the fascinating connection between the moon and the dramatic tides that grace the shores? Join us as we dive into a captivating myth that sheds light on this celestial phenomenon.
In ancient times, the Gods reigned supreme over the sky, the earth, and the seas, each realm governed by a distinct deity. It was a harmonious era when their story unfolded. Atop the celestial sphere, the Sun God held dominion over the skies, basking in the glory of his golden chariot as he surveyed his celestial kingdom. His beloved daughter, Luna, adorned the night sky as the radiant moon, embarking on celestial sojourns in her shimmering silver chariot whenever her father retired.
One moonlit night, Luna embarked on an uncharted path, venturing closer to where the vast sky meets the boundless ocean. The mesmerizing expanse of shimmering waters enchanted her, reminiscent of her ethereal abode.
As Luna stood captivated by the scene, she sensed an intriguing presence observing her every move. A young man, bearing a golden hue akin to her father’s brilliance, sat upon a rock, casting his gaze upon her. Initially cautious of the handsome stranger, Luna contemplated leaving the scene. However, his warm smile enticed her to stay.
Curiosity piqued, Luna inquired about his identity, revealing her divine lineage as the daughter of the Sky God. The young man, Mar, proudly disclosed that he was the son of the Sea God. This encounter marked the genesis of an extraordinary friendship.
Mar regaled Luna with captivating tales of the vast ocean and its wonders, while Luna reciprocated by sharing the celestial chronicles from her realm. Night after night, they revelled in the joy of storytelling, forging a profound bond.
Soon, their affection blossomed into love, prompting Luna to confide in her cousin about her clandestine romance with Mar. Unbeknownst to her, her cousin betrayed her trust by promptly informing her uncle.
The wrath of the Sun God blazed like his scorching golden rays when he learned of Luna’s transgressions. He summoned his daughter, vehemently admonishing her for violating the sacred laws that governed their celestial existence. Luna, pleading for understanding, professed her love for Mar, who, like her, hailed from divine origins.
Despite her pleas, the Sun God remained relentless in his anger, confining Luna within the confines of a garden. Meanwhile, a messenger was dispatched to deliver the news to the Sea God, who reacted with fury upon discovering his son’s forbidden affection. Mar, too, found himself imprisoned within a secluded sea cave, bearing the weight of his father’s disapproval.
Separated and consumed by longing, Luna and Mar yearned for each other’s presence. One fateful night, driven by an unquenchable desire to reunite, Luna orchestrated her daring escape from the garden, embarking on a celestial odyssey in her silver chariot toward the vast sea. From his secluded cavern, Mar caught sight of Luna’s ethereal reflection glistening upon the ocean’s surface, intensifying his longing to be reunited with his beloved.
Although Mar’s attempts to break free from his watery prison proved futile, his ardent struggle caused the waves to surge and swell with newfound vigour. The ocean roared in restless turmoil, mirroring the depth of their love and yearning.
Heartbroken, Luna returned to the heavens at daybreak, denied even a glimpse of her beloved Mar. There, she remained in a state of melancholy and desolation. Yet, whenever thoughts of Mar consumed her, Luna would descend swiftly in her silver chariot, hoping against hope for his liberation. Alas, Mar’s confinement persisted, and with each futile attempt to break free, the sea responded with heaving tides. Thus, the magnificent ebb and flow of the tides came into existence, forever entwined with the tale of Luna and Mar.
The enchanting celestial romance of Luna and Mar and its profound impact on the rhythmic dance of the ocean’s ebb and flow… That’s an eternal love story and one for keeps.
सेलफोन के ईजाद से बहुत साल पहले, एक काले रोटरी-डायल टेलीफोन के जादुई शक्ति ने मेरे बचपन और अस्सी के दशक में जन्में अन्य बच्चों की कल्पनाओं को ऊँची उड़ान दी थी।
देवाशीष मखीजा, लेखक और फिल्म निर्देशक
कोरोमंडल एक्सप्रेस में हमारे डिब्बे को अलग कर बैंगलोर मेल में लगाया जा रहा था। हमारे डिब्बे को छोड़कर अन्य सभी यात्रियों की यात्रा मद्रास में समाप्त हो चुकी थी । हमारा वाला डिब्बा करीब तीन घंटे से एक ही जगह स्थिर खड़ा था, और उसके दोबारा चलने के इंतज़ार ने मेरी बेचैनी को बढ़ा दिया था । मैंने माँ से हमारा काला वाला टेलीफोन मांगा ताकि मैं नानी को कॉल कर उनसे कुछ गुलाब जामुन भेजने के लिए कह सकूं। “अगर हमारी ट्रेन कभी शुरू नहीं हुई तो हम कभी बैंगलोर नहीं पहुंचेंगे,” मैंने कहा, “और पिंकू सब कुछ चट कर जायेगा ।” अपनी छोटी बेटी के साथ यात्रा कर…
In the sweltering heat of 2016, superstar Shah Rukh Khan’s Fan got a “Jabardast” Bhojpuri twist in Manoj Tiwari’s voice. The lyrics penned by Dr Ranju Sinha scorched the musical charts and cooled the heart and soul of Bhojpuri music lovers. The song was released in nine Indian languages, two foreign languages and a mashup version that was a remix version of all the 11 tracks. Here’s SRK Fan Dr Ranju Sinha’s personal relationship with her Superstar.
Shillpi a singh
If you are a die-hard Shah Rukh Khan Fan from the eastern part of India, where Bhojpuri is the native language, chances are that you would have made a secret wish to see the superstar groove to a Bhojpuri song. Lo and behold, the wish had come true sooner when the Jabardast Fan song from Shah Rukh Khan-starrer was recorded in Bhojpuri, among many other languages. The peppy version was sung by singer, actor and parliamentarian Manoj Tiwari. The Hindi lyricist was Varun Grover, while the Bhojpuri version was penned by Dr Ranju Sinha, a producer, director, and lyricist in Bhojpuri cinema. And like Gaurav in Fan, she states, “Connection Bhi Na Kamaal Ki Cheez Hal, Bas Ho Gaya To Ho Gaya, Mat Pucho Kaise.” A conversation with Sinha and her special musical relationship with the Superstar… as a Jabardast Fan.
It was Sinha’s first outing in the Hindi cinema, and she still can’t believe that she had managed to fulfil a part of her dream – write the lyrics for Badshah SRK.
Retaining the essence of the original Jabardast Fan song in Hindi, she peppered the song with her nuanced choices of frequently spoken Bhojpuri words that helped the song strike a chord with Bhojpuri speaking youngsters. The Bhojpuri version of the song was a rage in Western Bihar, eastern Uttar Pradesh and Jharkhand.
Reminiscing her Fan moment, Sinha says, “It was a dream come true for someone like me to write a song for the superstar. SRK’s movie was about how a fan makes a star. In my case, too, I would say, Fan made me a star, in some measure.”
Dr Ranju Sinha.
A renowned name in the Bhojpuri cine circuit, life is a beautiful coincidence for Sinha. Born in a middle-class family in Bihar’s Muzaffarpur district on March 15th, 1962, she was married off at the age of 16 to Neelmani Kumar Sinha, a Bihar government official. “I was married off soon after Class 10 exams. I thought marriage meant the end of my academic and creative pursuits. But my parents-in-law and husband proved me wrong. They ensured that I continued my studies and finished my Class 12th, bachelors, masters and even got a doctorate,” she says, with a lot of pride.
Armed with a doctorate, she joined Raj Narain Singh Inter College, Muzaffarpur, as a lecturer in the home science department in 2002. By then, her two children — daughter Pooja Priyanka and son Pancham Priyam — had been packed off to New Delhi for schooling.
In 2005, her daughter moved to pursue an undergraduate program in audiology and speech therapy at Ali Yavar Jung National Institute for the Hearing Handicapped, Mumbai. “My daughter was all alone in Mumbai. She was homesick, so I thought it would be a good idea to move to Mumbai; Pooja would get to stay at home with me and would be able to focus on her studies.”
A homemaker, who mostly spent her days and nights taking care of her home and family in Muzaffarpur, Sinha shifted base to Mumbai only to give company to her daughter. She had planned to return home after Pooja completed her studies. As they say, man proposes, God disposes. “Initially, I did not know what to do with a lot of free time in this city. But it made me discover the creative side of my personality, which has been the biggest takeaway of being in Mumbai.” She was fond of writing, and for the first few months, all that she did was contribute articles for magazines and newspapers in Mumbai. Her penchant for writing made her explore options as a lyricist in the film industry. A movie buff, Sinha enjoyed watching the latest releases, but she had zilch knowledge about the craft of film-making as she admits today. But she was destined to be part of the film industry.
She says her elder brother, Mumbai-based businessman late Raman Kumar Bachchan, helped her get a toehold. It was on his insistence that she started looking for a meaningful creative engagement in the Bhojpuri film industry. “I started my career by penning devotional songs in Bhojpuri for ‘Chhatt Maharani’ for T-Series.” Dhananjay Mishra had composed the songs while Manoj Tiwari, and Anuradha Paudwal sang the songs. “It was a good start for a newcomer. Renowned singers such as Manoj Tiwari and Anuradha Paudwal lent their voices to my words. I was overjoyed.”
There was no looking back for Sinha after her debut as a songwriter for this devotional album. Buoyed by the success of this venture, she went on to pen devotional songs for two more albums — Chalo Re Sai Dham and Sai Base Hain Kan Kan Mein. Today she is a sought-after lyricist and story writer in the Bhojpuri film industry, having penned songs for hit movies such as Sautan, Ajab Devra ke Gazab Bhaujai, Niruha Banal Don, Rangbaaz and Jai Ho Jagdamba Mai. But that’s not all. She successfully forayed into film production and direction under her home banner, Gauri Shankar Arts Private Limited. She has produced half a dozen movies, including Jai Ho Jagdamba Mai, Chandrika, Preet Bada Anmol, Paro Patna Wali and among many others.
“In a way, I am in the best phase of my life. My children are doing well. Pooja is married to Dr Shashank Kumar, a dentist here in Mumbai, and the couple has a son Dhwanit. My son Pancham is currently working as Project Manager in NIIT Technologies in London, and he lives there with his wife and son.” So does she intend to leave Mumbai and return to her roots? “As of now, my hands are full. There is so much to do that I can’t even think of doing so by any means. I can’t even afford to take a break from work.”
Recalling her long association with Tiwari, Sinha says, “We go back a long way. His voice has the Midas touch. It did wonders to my just launched career way back in 2006. I was glad to have him lend his voice for the Bhojpuri version of Jabardast Fan.”
However, the call from Yash Raj Films was quite surprising for Sinha, as she fondly recalls. “I had initially dismissed it as a prank call. I couldn’t believe in my wildest dreams that I got a call from YRF to sing a song for their movie. When I checked with the production house, I realized it was indeed true. I was over the moon,” she says.
Sinha is a self-proclaimed Fan of SRK. The Bhojpuri Fan song is still popular among the masses. But unfortunately, not many people know that ‘E dilwa tohre jabardast ab toh fan ho gayil‘ was my work. The crowd goes berserk still to hear it in Bhojpuri, and that gladdens my heart.”